Yesterday was a day of friendship.
I got to spend time with my dear friend Sonya who is a powerful and compassionate woman. She is helping me create a transformational workshop using the metaphor of dance that I’m planning for March. She shared with me her current struggles, and I shared my with her. She is one of those friends you can not talk to for a year and pick up right where you left off.
I also got to hang with my new friend, Ivonne. I met Ivonne at Dance Starz and immediately liked her. She is vibrant and inquisitive, and has an amazing zest for life. She’s one of those people you meet and suddenly, effortlessly, you are friends. No need to set up a coffee date, you just fall into an easy pattern of talking on the phone and meeting up for different activities.
Finally, I got to talk to another special friend, Erin, who lives across the country and has been experiencing some very difficult health issues. I hadn’t heard from her since I heard that she was injured, so I was thrilled that she called. She and I enjoy one of those very deep, authentic friendships in which we can share absolutely anything with one another and will receive support, even if it looks like tough love. She brings out the best in me, and reminds me of my specialness and awesomeness.
I treasure all my friends, so if you are reading this and you aren’t mentioned, it doesn’t mean I don’t love you, it just means that I didn’t see you yesterday! So call me! Let’s hang out soon.
Being with my friends yesterday, whether in person or on the phone was just what I needed. I am feeling much better about myself and life after sharing with my friends. This post, however, is mostly dedicated to Ivonne because she is a dancer like me, and this blog is, of course, mostly about dancing, right?
So Ivonne is amazing. Let’s just start there. She has been dancing all her life. She has a Cuban heritage and so dancing to rhythm is in her blood. But in terms of ballroom dancing, she just started in October. She’s already lost a partner and gained a new one. And, get this, she’s already committed to doing a competition next month! Can you believe it? This girl doesn’t mess around. I have rarely experienced this level of courage and committment in others. But with Ivonne, it is just one of her traits. She regularly dives head-first into experiences that may be beyond her current abilities. Listen, she blew me away when she told me about racing a Chinese Dragon Boat. How many people would say yes to an experience like that, especially when she just showed up because they needed one extra person on the team? They won gold!
I think being Ivonne’s friend is going to be a rich, effervescent adventure and I can hardly wait. It could also be very dangerous because she is comfortable with being uncomfortable. She has made it a habit to get out of her comfort zone, something I admire greatly about her, and want to do a bit more in my own life….but that comes with a price….the price of being uncomfortable, and even, gasp! failing once in a while. That, I have yet to experience as fun, but this I know: If you’re not failing at anything, then you’re not doing anything. (Hmmm, I should listen to my own advice)
So last night Ivonne came with me to Inna’s class at Imperial studio. Inna and Artem are busy placing first in the Rising Star category of the UK championship (Congratulations, guys!) so Igor taught the class.
I personally had a great time. It was actually pretty enjoyable for me, for once, because we wern’t doing cardio intervals in the form of Cha Cha combinations across their football-field-sized ballroom. Rather, we focused on technique. I especially liked the exercise he did taking each body part one at a time. We did the same combination over and over but first we focused only on our feet, trying to make them absolutely perfect, forgetting about anything else. Then we worked on the legs, then the hips, then the arms, then presentation. Finally we did it (ahem, attempted) to incorporate all aspects. He also had each student step forward and dance in front of the rest of us one-by-one.
Now, mind you, this is still an advanced level course. When Ivonne asked me if she could come, I didn’t want to discourage her. How many times are people passionate about something and others throw cold water on them to dampen their spirits, to tell them what is “reasonable” to do? Well, the heck with that! I think if Ivonne wanted to be there, then Ivonne should be there. No matter what, she could create value for herself, even if it was just by watching, even if she wasn’t yet able to do everything presented. Also, who am I to determine Ivonne’s limitations? I think Ivan has proven to me that I don’t even know my own limitations, so how can I possibly presume to determine them for another human being. So I decided to encourage Ivonne to join me. Maybe I could have mentioned that there is another class on Wednesday that might be less intimidating, or demanding, but even if I had, I have a feeling that Ivonne wouldn’t have backed down from the challenge.
So Ivonne came and told me about a quarter of the way in that it was way over her head. Oh well! She hung in there, did what she could, and even got in front of the class (Igor was kind enough to stand beside her for some support) just like us regular students.
I love her courage.
At the end of the class, Ivonne shared with me that she felt a little defeated, just like I had felt after Marieta’s class on Monday. But, also like me, she knew it would pass.
What a Samurai!
I’m just so proud of my new friend. She is open to the full experience of life and even the threat of potentially failing in the moment doesn’t deter her. I am excited for her as she prepares for the Dancesport Jam in Tucson, Arizona next month. I’m also excited for me because I get to watch her journey as she kicks butt and takes names and because she is my friend.
So for Tuesday, January 17, 2012, Ivonne, you are my hero. Just thought you should know. Love, Stef
Stef, I don’t even know what to say to that. My heart is so full right now. Meeting you – or rather, meeting each other because you happened to me, but I happened to you! – is just one more of those things that simply “happen for a reason.” I may have already told you, but will tell you many more times, that your strength and courage to follow your passions and live an authentic life impress and inspire me to continue doing the same in mine. Looking forward to getting uncomfortable together more often, hahahaha!
Thanks Stef…kind words from a kind woman who is FREAKING AMAZING!!!!!!!