Finally! Though not fully healed, I’m breathing well enough to have my first dance lesson in like two weeks.
It’s so very interesting to me how my obsession with dancing waxes and wanes over time. There are moments when I am compulsive about it. I want to spend every second on a dance lesson, or practicing, or watching endless hours of internet videos of both students and professionals dancing.
Then there are times when I don’t dance, like these past two weeks when I was sick, and it is somehow okay that I’m not spending every waking hour dreaming about dance. How odd.
But one thing is certain: it feels really good to dance, espeically after a little hiatus. I forget how cleansing it is for me on so many levels when I am without it for a while. Physically, psychologically, emotionally it’s like getting purified by a soft spring rain when I make the space in my life to dance.
Anyways, I showed up to my lesson kind of lukewarm about the prospect but, even so, amazing things happened. For one, by the end of the lesson Ivan was happy. He told me, “You give me energy. Like the past three days have been hard to sleep. Now, I feel good.” That was amazing to me because I didn’t feel like my usual ebullient self. I was just kind of neutrally present but not effervescent. Just by dancing together, both of our spirits were lifted.
Second, we worked on our frame. Ivan encouraged me to dance softly connected, gently holding on. I about cried when we danced the waltz, it was so beautiful. It reminded me of one of our first dance lessons. Ivan told me that one day maybe we’d dance together in Heaven. I don’t remember the context of the conversation or anything, but the comment stuck with me. Like somewhere on a soul-level I do believe that after we die we will meet up in the afterlife and dance together once again, swirling freely in rivers of energy, unencumbered by our bodies, floating among the clouds. And the dancing we did yesterday was probably about as close as I could come in real life to experiencing that. We were floating across the floor on strains of music rather than clouds, but just the same, it was a little piece of Heaven here on earth.
Also, I managed to dance for a full five minutes doing a Foxtrot. That is quite a cardiovascular accomplishment for me. Now, don’t get me wrong, it wasn’t like doing a Cha Cha for five minutes, but still, pretty good, especially after a bad cold. I was shocked.
Lastly, hugs. Ivan and I always hug to greet one another and to say goodbye. Not like, superficial quick squeezes, but rather full-on bear hugs. I was like, “Ohhhhh Ivan, I missed you.” And he was like, “Ohhhhhh Mocha, I missed you.” He said, “I miss the hugs.”
“But Ivan, you hug all your students. Don’t you?”
“Yes. But it’s different hugs with you.”
“Awwwww. Well, I do have a lot of body to hug!”
We laughed. But there is nothing better than a good, heartfelt, bear hug from a friend.
It makes me think that there are miracles everywhere in life if only I have the eyes to see them. And a lot of them happen for me when dancing.
Yep, dancing is my Heaven.