It happened. And he was a pretty good dancer.
We did Smooth and the best part was that our frame was so light and I barely got winded at all. It wasn’t technically perfect, and we had a few slight miscommunications in leads, but all in all it went really, really well. It felt very free and joyous. And hey, just because it happened while I was sleeping doesn’t make it any less real, right?
I blame this fanciful imagining on my choice of movie before going to bed. Not something I’d usually choose, but Eurotrip was on. It came on after something else was over and I just didn’t change the channel. But then there was this funny song in the movie sung by somebody, a rocker, who I didn’t recognize at first but upon closer inspection turned out to be Matt Damon. It was a little bit shocking.
To set the scene, the guy holding the cup and not jumping in the crowd is Scotty and he was dumped by Fiona very recently.
Also, as an aside, I found this scene from the movie entertaining and funny:
So anyways. It was a nice dream and I awoke to head off to a real dance lesson with someone even better. Although not a movie star, Ivan is still pretty dang cute. Just ask my mother-in-law. When she first met him she said, “I may be old, but I’m not dead!” Ha!
I told him about my dream and he was like, “Who is Matt Damon?” Ivan claims he’s only seen the movie Titanic. That’s it. But I came to find out that he has seen like House Party or some other equally awful movie when we were on the road trip to Desert Classic. I can’t remember which one exactly, but it was shocking. Like, you’ve seen only Titanic and House Party? You are such a weirdo!
So, nice dreams involving cute men and dancing aside, the real news is that I stumbled upon my goal for the upcoming Galaxy competition this morning. The goal is simply this: to be relaxed while dancing.
When I am relaxed, like I was this morning, I connect so easily and can follow. I have more movement in my body. I don’t get frustrated. I enjoy what I’m doing.
I came to this conclusion and pardon my French, but I kind of decided, “Fuck ’em!” Meaning screw the rest of the world when I’m dancing. You have to understand, though, that I don’t mean this in a disrespectful way. I mean it only in my own brain, and sometimes I have to go there to keep my Zen. I have to basically not care what other people think and just dance. Who am I dancing for, anyways? So one way for me to do that is to be all “F-you” in my brain and let go of the need to be liked because it gives me mental permission to not give a flying fig what others think. And in not caring, I am free. I can express myself without any editing, or holding back from fear. This is generally the opposite of my mental reality, and one effective way for me to flip that switch is to play this “Fuck ’em!” card. So that’s what I’m going to do, and I already think that it’s going to make my experience dancing at Galaxy more fun, more joyful, and that I will be more open and less scared and less stressed. A bit counterintuitive, I think, but hey, whatever works! Life is too short!
I’m also going to visualize that I’m just dancing at the studio, like I sometimes do on Saturday when there are other people around. Some people watch me dancing, others are involved in their own drama. Either way, its fine and I’m usually pretty relaxed.
So no matter how we place, no matter how we do, my goal is to be relaxed like I couldn’t find in myself at Desert Classic, and to have some of those magic moments of connection and expression – the real reason I love dancing. Basically to let it all hang out – to not get hung up so much on technique, and to just be in the flow. That’s it. That would be perfection.
So today it’s short and sweet. This is my new worthy goal. The Matt Damon that is the figment of my imagination would be proud.
relaxing. so much harder than it sounds! i have had a couple of lessons now where all my teacher has done was tell me to stop trying. i get his point, but i’m not encouraged by the idea that my dancing looks better when i stop trying.
Paragon, I so totally know what you mean. I have a freaking hard time with the concept and in all honesty I think I actively rebel and tense up every time someone tells me to freaking relax….and….when I find myself there naturally, well…. I personally DO dance better. All my practice and work pays off in automatic, unconscious currency and I am available to actually dance from my core. Gosh…realizing I’m going deep! anyways…I commiserate…and yeah, it is super counterintuitive that a person will do better when “not trying” especially when, if you are like me, you try SO hard all the time….ugh…all I can say is if it wasn’t a challenge it wouldn’t be interesting if it were easy…lol. keep up the good work and um, well, relax! just kidding! we will both work on it together!!!